Adventuring into the world of muscle, fat and stamina; voyaging myself to authentic body empowerment, fuelling a positive mindset that will last a lifetime. Years of my life have cascading into the abyss, forever dreaming of peak physical health and performance; I used to barrage myself with everyday excuses, waiting for the almighty ‘perfect time’ to arrive, I got tired of waiting for tomorrow, I impulsively started a fitness journey that dissolved a lifelong cycle, catapulting me to a level of confidence I never knew was possible.
July 15th 2025 was my turning point, my fitness journey begun, finally combating my body dysmorphia and taking on it’s nine lives; looking into the mirror for the billionth moment, seeing skin that felt foreign, a body that never felt truly mine, I raised a psychological finger and finally said, f*ck you. I was determined to finally conquer my perceived flaws and become confident in my own body, whilst concurrently seeing the magic of hormone replacement therapy (HRT). I brought gym apparatus, weights, resistance bands, a yoga mat and year’s subscription of Apple Fitness+ and since, not a day has passed where I haven’t completed a workout.
Once I started exercising, I knew that I didn’t want to stop for at least 90 days; the reason being, I knew through mythology, it takes twenty-one days to form a habit and ninety days to form a new lifestyle; despite neuroscientists claiming it’s more complex than that to build automatic habits and lifestyles, it’s worked for me in the past, so for the purposes of this blog, we’ll skip the science. I wanted to create a fitness lifestyle for myself, not because I wanted a Mel B body (I’m lying to myself), but because I want to lead a life of accountability; holding myself to account for the wins and losses life throws in my court, not stooping or excusing myself into a victim mentality.
I’ve closed seven full months of daily exercising, a streak that is still ongoing; a huge step forward for leading a life of integrity, teaching myself endurance, discipline and hard work pays for itself. I’ve had days where I wanted to give up, crying my eyes out, feeling worthless, but even on those days, where I felt dead inside, I didn’t collapse into self-pity; gritting my teeth, clenching my hands, I continued the fight, closing my Fitness+ rings, knowing I’d thank myself later. After every workout, my body was greeted with floods of endorphins and dopamine riffing through my veins; one of the best natural highs in life. I taught myself that through determination and resilience, I can achieve anything; even on the days I wanted to collapse to the floor whilst my emotions and premenstrual syndrome (PMS) symptoms were potent.
I’m now able to manage my body dysmorphia better through understanding, empowering my body through Meditation, Yoga, Pilates, Strength & Core training; whilst combing all that work with nutrient dense meals packed with high protein and superfoods; my mind has never been so alive, quick and electric, my body has never felt so rightfully mine.
There was a time back in 2017 where upon reflection is almost 10 years ago, yikes! I started a fitness journey that lasted about a year, in that time I dropped a lot of weight by simply going to the gym daily for 8 weeks mostly doing cardio, I was so proud of myself for that achievement; so why did I stop? I was battling depression and anxiety and eventually I took a day off, the streak was over, the momentum fell flat; I could sit here and say that stopping was the biggest mistake of my young-adult years, but I’m reversing the script, by stopping, I learnt so much about myself and my cognition that fast-forward to today, I use as motivation to continue and fight, showing up for myself everyday has brought me to where I am today, stopping even for a day off is not on the table anytime soon. You’re likely thinking, “So you’re never going to allow yourself a day off to rest?”, my answer is, I do rest, but that doesn’t mean I have to take a day off moving my body to honour my body; resting can look like reduced workout times, slow-flow yoga, meditation and three-mint tea.
The ability to sustain continuous energy throughout a typical day is a difficult balance at times, especially with my ADHD brain; achieving an energetic flow takes time, through exercise and healthy eating you find yourself stepping closer to understanding what makes your body flow. Understanding our bodies creates less fictitious ideologies about ourselves, eventually, we can find ourselves in an equilibrate state, finding synchronicity in life, energy and frequency.
I’m not where I wish to be physically yet, however, that’s the fun, the process of achieving; with anything in life, we achieve something, we become happy and fulfilled for a moment, then we look for something else to chase and achieve, it’s a healthy cycle but like anything, too much one way or too little the other, we lose balance. My grandad told my father a piece of life advice that he one day told me, “live life straight down the middle, aim to high, you’ll fall, aim too low, you’ll sink”, many connotations can be derived from such statement, my brain couldn’t help itself but to install the philosophy early on in my life and the more I grew, the more I observed, I realised, it’s a core fundamental principle of universal gravitation, what goes up, must come down, which is true for the physical and the metaphysical; finding balance is the key to sustained growth and energy.
My fitness journey is at the point where I am trying to find the perfect balance for sustained energy and daily flow. I have been testing limits, reaching targets, becoming stronger, dialling in form and breath work whilst simultaneously improving concentration, but, I was approaching burnout, I could feel its teeth approaching. I knew it was time to slow it down and recalibrate to essentially escape burnout. I was doing over eight hours of active exercise a week over seven days for three months, as much as I enjoy the intensity, I knew it was time to reduce to reflect, adapt and integrate a sustainable fitness regime; reducing my daily workout time to forty minutes a day, accompanied by a minimum five minute mediation. I narrowly avoided physical burnout, and now, I’m feeling fantastically alive.
I use my Instagram as a tool for self-motivation, posting my achievements to my story to serve as a reminder to myself that I am capable of manifesting my visions into reality; slowly carving my Instagram for self-empowerment to serve as inspiration to myself, curating a tool which is my profile, to consistently remind myself that when I’m feeling discouraged, to look back at my list of achievements and reinstall the ideology that I can achieve anything when I put my mind to the goal in question; my transition from male to female, visually documented, it’s proof that change is always possible, that nothing is out of the question, real change can happen at anytime; whilst becoming an inspiration to others, I need to most importantly inspire my future self, acting as a line of defence against the dark side of the mind, should I ever enter back into such state. Fitness is simply a building block of continued, self-empowerment, creating a powerhouse of possibilities in mind and body, whilst symbolising growth, confidence and authorship; in other words, my body is my vessel, my mind is the engine, my soul is the compass, the world? Is my sandbox.
It is important to influence that what we see online and post to our social media is typically our highlights, the surge of dopamine we feel when we get likes, comments and views is a drug; that sinking feeling, you know the one, when you see someone you’re envious of presenting themselves and all you’re perceiving is flawless perfection, you want what they have; but if you take a moment to reflect for a second, they’re simply showing off months, years, even decades of continuous hard work, they’re proud of their achievements, and you should be too; flipping the script for a moment, instead of competing, judging, letting jealously fuel the next move, take a moment out, ask yourself, if that person, who made you feel that sinking feeling, was your son or daughter, would you still be sinking?
Learning to be grateful and practicing gratitude is the best tool we can have in our everyday lives to eradicate the negative feelings of self righteousness we direct in ourselves over other individuals for simply being themselves; my body, your body, his body, her body, fluctuate; one minute my body looks toned and well posed for a quick photo, I eat a pinch of bread and the next minute, I blow up like the Michelin man, maybe I’m allergic or sensitive to gluten? I’m not ready to find out officially, the ignorance is bliss. However, my point being, by practising the art of not competing and comparing ourselves to others, we can collectively accept our bodies a lot easier, understanding that all bodies are different is empowering, believing your body needs to look exactly like someone else’s is critically unrealistic; as a collective, we should strive and learn how to love ourselves, inside and out with compassion and kindness, first; because then, we can authentically love, appreciate and support others on a much deeper, meaningful level.
You see someone smashing a fitness goal? Support them. You see someone who inspires you to be better? Support them. You’re proud of someone for achieving something important to them? Tell them. There’s no better feeling than being told you’ve made a difference in someone else’s life, however big or small; offering words of appraisal shifts perspective. Kindness is more than sharing or liking a post, anyone can showcase themselves as kind, but words? Words change lives, comment, use your voice; and maybe, if you catch yourself judging, ask yourself, why.
The human body is a cataclysmic phenomenon, the fact we exist is one thing, getting this far developmentally is another; our bodies are vessels into the physical, containing our soul, our energy, our aura; our eyes are projectors, we get to choose what colours we project. Observing life a little closer, I realised that everyone I’ve met is living out their own unique universe, curated and stimulated by their brains; a universe contained within all of us, we surf through the multiverse in the physical, weaving through millions of timelines every day; so, practice passing with integral kindness and look after your vessel, you wouldn’t want to be the reason someone’s timeline branches off into negative territory, would you?
All Things Jamieee ✨ 